Love and Money

Well it is that time of year again; that time of year when most men are extorted or made to feel guilty into that wonderful tradition to show women our love. Yes I am talking about Valentine’s Day. The day that has been popularized by those wickedly sadistic people at the greeting card companies, in conspiracy with florists, candy makers, etc., whose sole desire to spread warmth and love all over the world, at a healthy profit.

Of course, a woman would never imagine forcing a man to show his love in this way, but if he forgets, he is dead meat. Actually it is not an imposition for men to celebrate Valentine’s Day and make her happy but it is the principal of the thing. Why force a man to show his love based on other’s selfless greed? My wife is subtle about Valentine’s Day. She usually will ask me ‘So what are you going to get me?’ Once, my wife even enlisted outside help to remind me. The local grocery store owner kept reminding me prior to the day said I should surprise her with a gift of flowers, which he was selling. I bought what he was offering but was perturbed. So, the next year I thought I would strike a blow for men everywhere by not buying her a present. My goal was to show my wife I could not be bullied and then she would see the light. I would be free and men everywhere would say my name in awe. Was I an idiot! Whoever said ‘Hell has no fury as a woman scorned’ probably did not buy his wife a present.

Gentlemen, take the path of least resistance and lay down your money to show her your love and save your skin. She is worth it. If you forget, play dumb. Women think that this is a natural state. But we know better. It is a highly refined self defense mechanism.